“Read” Between the Lines

Why isn’t there a handbook that tells you how to read men’s emotions? Many men will tell you they aren’t emotional. That’s a lie. In my experience men normally choose to use less obvious social queues to display emotion. That doesn’t mean the emotions don’t exist.

Scenario: Woman walks onto a bus/train and sits on a pincushion full of pins.

Reaction: Woman screams/cries/jumps in surprise and discomfort. Everyone rushes toward her to see if she is okay.

Scenario: Man walks onto a bus/train and sits on a pincushion full of pins.

Reaction: Man winces in pain and discreetly removes the pincushion, or rather the pins, from his ass. Everyone is okay.

Same scenario.  Different reactions. So maybe from a purely hypothetical standpoint I do read men’s emotions well. Or at least I can predict a likely outcome. Of course not all men react the same, some women react like men. It’s not foolproof. I haven’t conducted this scenario in an experiment. Most people would argue that poking someone with pins is unethical. It would be kind of funny though. Those men sitting down like nothing is wrong and then trying to simultaneously wipe their tears and pull pins off their…umm lets just say pants. So based on my observations I can make a few valid assumptions.

First, let’s all agree that both the man and woman had a reaction. We can also deduct that the reactions were different. So screaming followed by crying most often is indicative of an emotion. In the woman’s case her emotion was surprise. In the man’s case while he experienced the same amount of pain his reaction suggests that he did not connect an emotion with the pain experienced. He was likely surprised but may not have shown overt surprise as the woman did. As we all know pricking your finger on a spindle will kill you……

I’m sorry, wrong story. That was Sleeping Beauty.

To survive potential embarrassment a man may be more likely to hide the emotion felt when being pricked whereas women simply react to the situation. It’s not that a man doesn’t feel the same pain a woman does he just rearranges his emotions so that from a woman’s untrained perspective he can deem himself unemotional. Again these are just my opinions. I don’t pretend to know exactly what’s going through the male brain. My point in all this is that women are much more likely to react outwardly and thus we are considered more emotional.

My other point in all this is to give a more masculine reaction to my current emotions. I’ve noticed that toning down my reaction to any situation can help me see just the facts. The man and the woman might be doing different things but the bottom line…HA! I am so clever…both of those people were probably surprised if they sat on a pile of pins. Hopefully you haven’t cringed the whole time as I’ve committed numerous crimes of crappy humour…puns. I have to make up silly scenarios to keep myself invulnerable to the danger’s I may find if I die from a pricked finger. Now I’m going to listen to Howie Day’s fabulous album Sound the Alarm.

Maybe I’m so bad at reading men’s emotions this whole post is completely wrong. Oh well, at least I try to understand.