I seem to have a steady following from readers to this blog but thank goodness it isn’t related to how my stock on my IRA or 401K, if it was I’d be in bad shape. Regardless of the number of people who actually read it, I find it rewarding to get up and write something. Even if it isn’t hugely popular, that’s not why I choose to write. My blogs give me a way to look back and see what I’ve accomplished. Though in the last couple years that doesn’t amount to much. Pretty soon I’ll be shipping out and writing from a large boat. I’d like to learn some new languages, at least French, Spanish and American Signing. Hopefully my trip around the world will bring me new friends.
It’s Christmas Eve and I can’t wait til tomorrow. I’ve still got three pies to throw in the oven. I’ll be spending the day with those I love most and we are all in the Christmas mood, perhaps as a result of playing Michael Buble continuously.
I was hoping the letter I wrote to my friend would encourage her to call but she seems to have chosen to part ways. She’s a twin so I loose two friends as a result. That makes me a bit sad. There is little logic in her sudden disposal of our friendship. I’ve tried to find some reason but I’m at a total loss. One day we were talking and the next she removed me from her life, literally with the click of a button. I’ve spent several hours crying about it but I want to move on. With the New Year approaching I resolve to not look back or try to further contact her. If she wants to get in touch she knows how and I don’t want to be overbearing. I went through my anger stage of grief last night and wrote her a terribly nasty letter. It’s probably the worst letter I’ve ever written. I burned one copy symbolically and kept the second copy as a reminder to myself how hurt I was. I would never consider sending this letter to her. However unkind she was to me, the letter was too bitter to give to someone who was my friend for ten years. I wish her the best, though my letter tells a different story, and I hope she finds her way in the world. Though she was as close to me as any of my sisters I remember that sometimes people just feel the need to break away and start fresh.